Anything wrong with me?

Just as I closed my eyes drifting to my own wonderland, I suddenly awoke with complete blankness. It's been like this for the past month or two and I'm not really taking it seriously. I told myself that it is okay to be like this. Everybody else has the same problem, I'm trying to convince myself.

NO, this is not right. Not being able to fall asleep until 3 or 4 am is not normal. As a matter of fact, this post serves as the proof. 4.10am and still up, typing depressingly. I think I am suffering from some kind of anxiety or sleeping disorder. I am making myself a total freak right now. Gawd, I'm so worried.

Okay, lets do a little evaluation here. I'm 23, which is still considered young, I hope. =) I have a career, I have a dog, I have a boyfriend. I have a roof to storm the cold, the night, the day, the whatever. Meaning having a place to stay considering living in San Francisco can be a bit of a bitch sometimes. Money? Enough to feed the three of us. Who says you can have all the money in the world?
Next question, pessimist or optimist? Definitely optimist. So what's WRONG?Did I overwork myself? Did I do something so wrong that God has put a bad curse on me?
Think...think..think...

My boyfriend always tells me not to thinkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk too much. He says I'm just being paranoid. I'm sick of hearing him saying I am thinking too much because I don't! That's the first symptom that I detected to be weird. My brain is constantly working but it is just not doing what I'm telling "it" to perform. I honestly want to put myself to rest but my brain is not listening!!Nobody listens!! I told a friend about this and he frankly replied by asking if I'm feeling depressed and am I falling into depression? How the hell do I know if I really am depressed and going crazy? Do I sound like I'm a nutcase now? I really appreciate his candor though but maybe my problem is not really that severe. Another friend suggested that I have to stop watching tv. True or false? haha..this is becoming a true or false game to me now. I think this is going to be a neverending saga. sigh..

Ok, well, I went to Costco after work today and had close to 30 mins to shop. You know, when you shop at costco, you are constantly looking at "cheaper" stuff and get all excited. So thirty minutes aint enough for a bargain shopper like me. hehehe...I love going to costco. First and foremost, for its ROASTED CHICKEN!!! hahaha..second, for PLAYSTATION 2 GAMES!! Third, for the cheap stuff..you know, cheapo..hehehehe..
Sometimes I would tell myself, going to costco is sorta like the love and hate kinda relationship. I love shopping there but I hate buying stuff. Am I a really confused person now?hehe.. No, because nobody likes to see the digits of their online statement go from 4,3,2,1 and to nuthing!!! I used to buy a lot of crap from costco. A lot. Movies that I wont even touch, games that I simply chuck it somewhere, books that function as my writing board...and things, just things that I keep sorta like memorabilia from costco.hahaha..Now being the wiser me,ya right =P, I tend to spend less. Spending a whoopee stinky 65 bucks!!!!$30 goes to my bf's razor blades. Ohkay, stinky razor blades. Curse those stinky hair that grow on people's face!!!!Yuck..


Yuck yuck yuck..does he eat his hair as well?

Okay now, enough of my ramblings. Im sick of it myself. haha..Let me try to get some sleep and stop picturing the guy eating his own moustache. hehe

tata...